The Ups and Downs of My Life

I just don't get it. I just don't understand why my daddy comes home for 44 hours a week then leaves again for five days. I think I will sit by the front door in case this insanity is over finally. It can't go on much longer!

I have been busy lately working on my hunting skills because little birdies dare fly by my window. I have also learned to balance atop the pantry door while my mom rustles about inside looking for gross human food. Speaking of human food, I really love me some Wheat Thins. I chew them like gum and spit them out. But mostly, I follow my mommy around to make sure she doesn't get lonely. She says I am the man of the house while my daddy is away. I'm a man cat!

A message from my mommy about work stuff. I don't really care, but sort of absorb this as I lay next to the laptop. Actually, this is a cool website

More Stones though, play me some more Rolling Stones! And Foghat. I want some damn foghat. Anyway, here's my mommy's message to you:


Check it out! We've got a smashing new Peak website! Oh, happy day! Let's raise a glass! (Okay, so I've raised a couple glasses since I finished my research paper a couple hours ago. But I digress).

It's got Peak TV with Hollywood Hoo Ha, the one 45 at 1:45 (that's 45 as in 45 record to you young'uns), it's got the Peak blog, but I don't know who writes that stuff.

It's also got photos of Scotty, Mary, Monica, Steve and Mini! See, they look better than you thought they did!

So here's the URL: Tell a friend!

More will be coming with the Peak site, so bookmark it. Blinklist it. Make it your homepage. Listen live. Enter contests.

And look at how sexy Monica is!

And don't forget to equest a song! Especially while I'm on the air 7p-12a every Saturday night hosting the Peak Party! Because my life is empty if I don't shamelessly self-promote!

987ThePeak.com.

I Tried To Sneak Into His Suitcase But He Caught Me

My daddy is gone again. I tried to be a castaway in his suitcase, but he kicked me out. It's not fair! Who will play FUD with me? Mommy sucks at it. And now Mommy will be all bitchy again with daddy out of town. My daddy didn't spend much time with me while he was home either! I think I am mad about this.

He kept taking my mommy on dates. What am I, chopped tuna? He had to take Mommy out to dinner, out for wine, out for massages, out for lunch, out to grocery shop for Mommy, cleaning the house for Mommy...Mommy, mommy, mommy! Always pampering Mommy! What about The Traz?

And nobody has taken me to see my grandparents and my uncle Jimmy in a couple weeks. What's up with that? I think Aunty Monica is my favorite person now. At least she's funny!